Category Archives: TV

I(‘m not) ain’t dead yet*

Those in the know have some idea of my Internet problems, and it’s…problematic.

Fortunately, sometime within the next couple days I am switching back to a cable DSL. Unfortunately, I can’t post anything of any substance until my internets get better…

Just letting you know that I’m still alive, and plan on being so for a good long while.

Also..

Your votes helped me in to the finals of Antisocial Networking’s Nerd Crush contest and I need your help once again. The final round of voting ends Thursday at 12 PST.

PATTON!

*The title is actually a double reference: “I ain’t dead yet, Motherfucker!” is the title of a documentary about Richard Pryor, and “I’m not dead yet” is a famous quote from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

It isn’t hard to beat suck…

I guess I had a good day today… Which after the mediocre week I had, it really means a lot.

From 8am to 10:30ish in the morning I was in orientation for my summer job. Orientation wasn’t even that bad because I sat there for 2 hours, was told to be safe, and was paid more than 5 hours of work at Radio Shack. One of the highest points in my day was when I was told that my new job required me to be able to operate something called “the crane”. I have no idea what “the crane” is, but the thought of operating excites me to no end…

I got home at 11am and I didn’t see another living human being, that wasn’t on the television or the Internet, till about 10pm. Whenever I don’t see people for long stretches of time, and I can get more stuff done, the day instantly moves up to 80th percentile. The great thing about the end of my day is that I got to work on one of sooper sekrit projektz, and I finally got my hands on some awesome garlic bread pizza.

All is right with the world. (finally…)

Tomorrow I’m taking a trip down to New Hampshire for some great barbecue, and then I’m going to make my way back up here to catch a Drive-In movie. Lots of pictures will be taken and shared.

There is no Caveman, there is only Zuul…

It is nearing the end of my second semester of college and in my College writing I’ve been sacked with the choice of writing an analysis essay on anything I fancy. Giving me a choice of anything to write about is taint amount to giving a handgun to a cute puppy, there are a billions of ways it could end but no matter what happens the end product will be entertaining. Last time it happened I was a sophomore and I wrote an investigative report which fingered the mafia as being responsible for the assassination of John F. Kennedy.

This time around I’m taking a less dark turn, and I’ve decided to write about something more lighthearted. I had several ideas which mainly came from TV and movies and I threw the proverbial dart which stuck once I discovered that the “Ghostbusters” box set was on sale.

As recorded in the annals of time, the fifth and final paper for my College Writing class will be “The cultural significance of the movie Ghostbusters” and it is shaping up to be my third best essay ever.

I just discovered that Bob Dylan is coming to my city in a month. My tickets will be bought tomorrow, and more details will follow.

Must see T.V.

Last night was the first episodes of the television shows “the Office” and “30 Rock” in several months due to the writers’ strike. I would normally be the first one to discuss last night’s events, but of course me being the big sleepy dork that am I completely passed out by 8:30. When I woke up this morning, needless to say I was upset with myself.

I tried nbc.com to see if they put the new episodes up for stream, but alas I was foiled…

After a few quick emails and a phone call or two I quickly discovered a friend of mine who is a even bigger “Office” fan and a Tivo owner. After a quick stop for pizza I swung by and commandeered her living room.

It is unfortunate that she isn’t more of a “30 Rock” fan, I heard last night’s episode was awesome.

I discovered this short story not long ago, and I find it utterly terrific. The basic premise of the story is that it is a chunk of posts from a message board for time travelers, and it covers some of the gold that I think makes “our” Internet so great.

Question: If you could travel back in time what would you do first?

Momma don’t let your boys grow up to be John McClane

While I was working today a young child who was probably 5 or 6 runs into my store being chased by his apparently angry mother. This isn’t an unusual sight so I continue to go about my duties. I turn back around to ask another customer if they needed any help and I hear from around corner: “Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!“. I take quick peak to see what all the commotion was about and I see the apparently angry mother from before now trying to hold on to her struggling child who was letting loose a string of “Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!” “Pinko bitch!” and “Motherfuckin’ motherfucker!”.

As she struggles to drag her child out of the store an obviously embarrassed gentleman (most likely the father) joins them and they precede out. My co-worker, obviously shocked by the event, turns to me and asks “What the hell was that?“. The father turns back to us and with a defeated look on his face responds “TV in his room…Die Hard…2

Jerry Seinfeld is screwing with my life.

Ever since I was 8-ish I believed I dreamed up an entire episode of Seinfeld. The dream episode was complete with a sub-plot of Kramer going to the bank because if any workers at the bank didn’t greet a prospective customer with a “Hello” the customer got $100.

I just saw that episode on the t.v., and it’s truly screwing with my prospective on life. If I dreamed of an episode that already existed, what else did I “dream”.

What I learned in my Geology class

In Superman 1, Lex Luthor buys up all the property along the San Andreas fault, and plans on committing “the greatest real-estate swindle of all time.” To accomplish this Luthor hijacks two test missiles, sends one to New Jersey to distract Superman and the other to the San Andreas to cause an earthquake that sends California into the ocean.

I learned that it is impossible for a missile (of any size) to cause an earthquake, and even violent quakes won’t make large pieces of land break off (which unfortunately means no  Escape from L.A either).

But that whole Road Runner cartoon thing with the boulders, weird rock ramps, and cliffs is totally possible. Just add one industrious coyote with a disposable income, and one *beeping* road runner.

Trust me it’s the good stuff.