Hollywood Movies That Irritate Me To No End.

I love movies, and I watch an almost obscene amount. During whatever free time I have day or night if I’m not doing much, I pop in a movie. I have seen a lot of movies good and bad, but there are somethings that catch my attention and won’t enjoy a movie for being a movie. Those little things irritate me to no forseeable end and eventually take me out of the movie.

( Warning: The content below may contain plot points and spoilers.)

Open Water (2003)

Open Water is a “based on a true story” man against nature tale that eventually leads to an hour and a half of near silent movie were a couple slowly get eaten to death. Very slow, and I found myself fast-forwarding through the quiet parts. The thing that I found irritating about the flick was a nude scene.

Now, I have no problem with nude scenes. (I can see this sentence coming back to bite me. Oh well..) I come from a school of thought that says nude scenes are great (I think I’ve killed my run for public office.) if they serve a purpose. 99% of movies with nudity use it to convey something important (like horror movies using it to push the point of a false safety), the other 1% are pornos.

Early in the film (before the eating to death) the couple are in the hotel room, and Mrs. GoingToBeEatenToDeath is stark naked on the bed reading a book. Mr. GoingToBeEatenToDeath enters from the bathroom, she puts down the book and they go to bed. There is no reason for the actress to be naked other than a filmmaker throwing cash at a pretty girl to take her clothes off

(I’m just now realizing that this was a bad idea, but I don’t have anything else prepared. Here you go…)

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9 responses to “Hollywood Movies That Irritate Me To No End.

  1. I found the nudity awkward and distraction. Not to mention that “Open Water” is just a bad movie.

  2. That would be “distracting,” not “distraction.” See how distracting it is?!?

  3. Really, 1% of movies with nudity are pornography? Really? I think you got your percentages backward.

  4. Loss Adjuster- very true. The nudity was almost the filmakers trying to makeup for such a slow, boring film.

    Annika- Really? I must have been thinking back to my youthful days before “all medias” were made readily available to me.
    …Ah, horribly awkward times.

  5. I have issues with water movies, so I didn’t see this one. Really, I lived by the beach so I couldn’t handle shark movies…
    I’d like to nominate The Perfect Storm for this list.
    And The Last Mimzy. (Which knocked Perfect Storm out of the “worst movie I’ve ever seen” position.)

  6. Sonja- The Perfect Storm is now the list. If I remember correctly, it has a scene were a crew member gets eaten by a gigantic shark that washes aboard the ship…

  7. I didn’t get past the first 45 minutes of that movie before I turned it off. It was so bad that I don’t even remember there being boobs.

  8. i was just telling someone the other day about that stupid movie, and how much i hated it. we had to SUFFER through those hours and hours of bullshit and then they fucking died.

    promise to NEVER make a movie like that, promise!

  9. Piglet- That is my promise to you.

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